Giving Back at Christmas

Giving Back at Christmas

We discuss some of the ways in which you can give something back this Christmas—from donating to those less fortunate, to helping out a friend, neighbor or stranger.

‘Tis the season for goodwill to all men, and women. Take any Christmas movie: from It’s a Wonderful Life to Miracle on 34th Street, The Santa Claus Movie to Scrooged, Elf to Love, Actually, Gremlins to - no, wait. We’ll leave Gizmo and pals out of this. Gremlins aside, what’s always the most important thing, saving the day and leaving a lump in the throat? (the heart-warming kind, not a stray walnut). Why, Christmas spirit, of course. Love, kindness, appreciation (and um, in the case of Elf, maybe also some marshmallows). But in real life, goodwill can get easily lost in the festive shuffle.

Of course, we have seemingly infinite demands and distractions filling our time, and even more so at Christmas. There are sleigh-loads of gifts to buy, and wrap (mustn’t forget Beryl from Accounts’ Secret Santa!), cards to write, and mail (what time does the Post Office close again?), party finger food, and festive feasts to prepare (is it gherkins or green beans that bring cousin Matt’s new girlfriend out in hives?), plus an abundance of social engagements and obligations (can you get to all those parties, especially as the hangovers begin to take their toll?)... And speaking of festivities, is your favorite party frock still at the bottom of the laundry basket?

Another festive flaw: many would bemoan the commercialization of the holidays, and not without cause. Stores start filling with Christmas goods before Halloween, commercials relentlessly present us with must-buy gifts, and the pressure to have a picture-perfect holiday - coming soon to a Facebook or Instagram feed near you! - can take some of the joy out of what should simply be a time of celebration, and giving… if not necessarily in the bow-wrapped material sense.

But there’s a remedy to the distracting and consuming busyness, and the big sell: spreading a little goodwill over the holidays. It’ll be jolly and life-affirming for you and the recipient of your kindness - especially in these strange times, where joy and hope can feel in short supply. We had a chat with a bunch of folk to find out ways in which they’ve experienced the glow of goodwill by giving back at Christmas. So take time out from your festive To Do list, grab an eggnog, and see if this gives you ideas for sharing some all-aglow good cheer - and making someone else’s holiday a little more special.

Don’t let others be lonely at Christmas

Don’t let others be lonely at Christmas

A few of those we spoke to had invited friends they knew would be alone over the holidays to share in their own Christmas… which is a lovely thing to do. And there’ll be more than enough food, and a spot on the couch for the afternoon game of Trivial Pursuits, right?

Mary Monro

A few years ago an old friend of ours was dying and she knew it would be her last Christmas. She was Croatian and her favourite Christmas meal was roast suckling pig. She had no family here and was going to be alone, so we offered to do Christmas lunch, piglet and all the trimmings, to make it a special day. I have never cooked piglet (before or since) but it was well worth it for the joy on her face.


Mary Monro certainly has many talents: she is an osteopath, an experienced lecturer, presenter, and author of technical and academic articles. She also recently pubished her first book Stranger In My Heart.

www.strangerinmyheart.co.uk

Fiona Stocker

Our family are mostly overseas and we don’t get to see them at Christmas. So we invite other people over for a beautiful lunch and slightly boozy, lazy afternoon, if we know they’re in the same position. One year we had all the divorcees we knew, and one woman whose husband was a mechanic on a ship at sea. We bought everyone a simple, inexpensive gift that we thought they’d enjoy, and made our favourite things for an Australian Christmas lunch – salmon koulibiak, sausage rolls for the kids, and a luscious Nigella Lawson summer pudding with raspberries from the garden. It gave everyone somewhere to go, easy company and a lovely day spent eating and drinking in the sun out the back, overlooking the garden and the paddocks.


Fiona Stocker is author of recently published memoir, Apple Island Wife and co-owner of a ‘tiny family farm’ in Australia.

www.appleislandwife.com

Oli Jacobs

A few times I have had friends who would normally be alone at Xmas round with us, so that they have someone to spend the season with. It’s always made for an extra special time, and is something I would recommend all to do.


Oli Jacobs is author of a number of sci-fi novels and eclectic short story collections. His upcoming horror novel, Deep Down There, is currently available for pre-order.

www.olijacobsauthor.wordpress.com

Books

Volunteer Your Time

Volunteer Your Time

If you don’t have friends or relatives to look after, you could donate time over the holidays and volunteer at a shelter or charity that would appreciate extra hands on deck.

Julia Kite

Remember that people’s everyday needs don’t go away just because it’s Christmas – homeless shelters and soup kitchens still need volunteers. Especially if, like me, you have no religious obligations on the day, it’s a great time to help out when service providers are likely to be short on staff.


Julia Kite is a transportation policy advisor in New York City, and author of novel The Hope and Anchor. Her shopping tip? ‘Fish’s Eddy is my favourite place for whimsical housewares. Everyone can use a few more glasses, especially if you’re prone to breaking a few after eggnog. They have lots of cool New York-related designs.’

www.juliakite.com

Ryan Shrime

We’ve done the meals on wheels, community service thing a few times, but it hasn’t been foremost on our minds. I’d like to do more of it. My sister took her family to an event at a fancy hotel in Dallas where they invite the homeless community to stay a night in their hotel. They shower, relax in the room, and are given clean clothes and served at the hotel restaurant by people in fancy clothes and tuxedos, etc. It sounds like a wonderful event, and I’ll probably participate in it this year.


Ryan Shrime is a multi-talented actor/writer/producer.

Abby Hitchcock

I have never done this but I know of people who have gone to homeless shelters/community houses and served food to the poor/homeless. That kind of thing is so admirable. I always think I should do this but never have. My aunt buys everyone in our family chickens/goats etc. in our names for people in Africa through Heffer International. That feels really good.


Abby Hitchcock is a Chef, and Owner of New York City restaurant, Camaje. Here’s her shop tip: ‘I love practical gifts and I think The Grommet is awesome for those.’

www.camaje.com

Be Creative with Spreading Festive Cheer

Be Creative with Spreading Festive Cheer

Last Christmas I worked a large local bookstore over the holidays, and volunteers from a nearby charity would come in at weekends on the run up to Christmas and set up a Gift Wrapping Station. For a small donation, they’d wrap customers’ gift purchases, which was fun - and helpful for those who are rather less elfy with Sellotape and ribbons. You could offer to do a similar thing in your workplace, or in your neighborhood: offer to wrap folks’ presents for a charitable donation (you could ask them to bring their own paper!). In fact, I used to spend a pre-Christmas evening babysitting at a friend’s - letting he and his wife have a festive night out while I wrapped their gifts (I was paid in wine).

And speaking of babysitting, if you have friends with kids, you could offer to look after the little ‘uns so they can run festive errands, or get to attend a party without fretting about the cost of a sitter. Of if you’ve an elderly neighbor who’s not so mobile, offer to help with doing their Christmas shopping - and maybe bring some wine to share with them when you deliver it?

Then there’s this story from Virginia:

Virginia Moffatt

I have in the past (volunteering, working in social care) which I really enjoyed. But nothing since I’ve had children as the focus has been on them having a nice time. Now they’re all older, I think it might be good to revisit that so maybe in the future…I also used to love carol singing for charity when I was a kid, I’d love to see people carol singing round the houses again.


Virginia Moffatt is a procurement and contracts manager, and author of Echo Hall. No doubt relatable for many readers, she doesn’t have any gift store suggestions, saying ‘I am the WORST person in the world to ask this as I hate shopping.’

www.virginiamoffattwriter.wordpress.com

Know that the smallest gestures can have the biggest impact

Know that the smallest gestures can have the biggest impact

You may fret that you don’t have a huge amount of time - or money - to give when it comes to holiday gestures. But the smallest of kindnesses - often free! - can be more appreciated than you might know.

Many years ago, just before going away for the holidays, I was mugged (I know, horrible), and all the money I was due to be taking was stolen. This resulted in two incredible kindnesses: firstly, my lovely and exemplary bosses gave me a Christmas bonus to replace the money. Then, after a long flight, I arrived at the airport and was unable to find the friend who was meeting me (this was the days before cell phones!). Hovering near the payphones, tired and upset, a lady nearby stopped to ask me if I was okay. At that point, I hadn’t had a conversation with anyone for multiple hours, and frazzled, blurted out a nutshell explanation about the mugging and my predicament. This stranger than handed me a $20 note, uttered some supportive words, and walked away. I’ve never forgotten what that meant to me: I’d experienced an act which struck a blow to my faith in humanity, and now this fellow human had made a gesture which flipped that back (and made me think, whatever your beliefs, that there are angels of sorts in the world).

Here’s another story of a small gesture, which is frankly adorable:

Abby Hitchcock

I have a 94 year old friend (we've been in an Alexander Technique class together for the better part of 20 years). She uses a walker. They are such dull looking instruments. Well having admired my faux flowers on my bike basket (I ride around on a vintage 3-speed bike adorned with colorful fake flowers), it came to me that she should have some on her walker. She loved them. But it was more than that. People stop her because of the flowers on the walker. She ends up chatting away. She has said repeatedly that it is one of the best presents she has ever received. Considering her age, this is quite a compliment. She even wrote about it in her writing group and gave me a copy. The flowers cost me less than $5 but her happiness is priceless!

Regift Unwanted Presents - in a Charitable Way

Regift Unwanted Presents - in a Charitable Way

Instead of bunging them on Ebay to make a few dollars, or putting them in the closet for handy regifting, you could take them to goodwill, or a local shelter. And receiving the lovely scarf set from Aunt Gayle might mean that some of your other winter warmers could be passed on to those who’d make appreciative use of them (or if you’re attached to what you’ve already got, pass along the new ones!).

Mia Underwood

I always have a good clear out after Christmas. And, give a lot of bags of toys and clothes to charity and to our local schools - especially if there have been any unwanted gifts.


Mia Underwood is a Designer, Illustrator and author of a number of books, including My Felted Friends and the forthcoming The Secret Woodland Activity Book (incidentally, a perfect gift for kids age: 4 to 11 years old!).

www.miaunderwood.co.uk

Mia's Books

Tabatha Stirling

I re-gift a lot. And when I was flush I would take my son around Edinburgh giving £20.00 to all the homeless on Princes Street. That’s a good feeling.


Tabatha Stirling is a Publishing director, book cover artist, and author of the upcoming novel, Bitter Leaves. Her elfy shopping tips are UK-based www.notonthehighstreet.com and the Literary Gift Company.

www.stirlingpublishing.co.uk

There’s also this sweet story from Tommy, which is a heartening tale of regifting something he could easily have kept and enjoyed for himself:

Tommy Stewart

The best thing I ever did was that I was given a huge turkey by my employer, which I certainly could have eaten. However, I took it down to a homeless shelter and gave it to them. Those folks deserved and needed it more than I did and I was told afterward that it was much appreciated. Glad they enjoyed it.


Tommy Stewart is a Freelance Comedy Writer/Producer and Broadcaster. For gifts he opts for all-rounders such as Amazon or Ebay, and says ‘Walmart or Walmart.com seems to have everything these days, too.’

Be Aware of Others’ Circumstances at Christmas

Be Aware of Others’ Circumstances at Christmas

Of course, Christmas can be a tricky time for many people, for all sorts of reasons. We should be thoughtful and remember that folk often have struggles or considerations that we may not know of, or be able to see. So show a little extra kindness and empathy for those who may not be feeling happy over the holidays.

Tabatha Stirling

Just be kind & don’t expect everybody to love the holiday. Can be very difficult.

So there we have just a handful of ideas for Giving Back at Christmas. But of course, there’s an almost infinite number of things you could do to spread kindness and good cheer, including these additional gestures, as suggested by the folk at The Kindly Collective, and AES International:

Commit to one random act of kindness for a stranger over the Christmas period – it could be anything from donating a spare blanket to a homeless person, to buying a warm cup of coffee for a cold security guard or police officer on duty. Use your imagination!

Buy a hot drink and a meal for a homeless person – ask them what they’d like you to get for them, giving them some choice and dignity will be greatly appreciated.

Donate blood.

Leave the biggest tip you can afford at the restaurant you visit all year.

Offer to buy coffee for the person standing next in line to you at Starbucks...

… Or let that person go in line in front of you.

Offer to drive a friend who’s going away for the holidays to the airport.

Think of kind things others have done for you and return the favor.

Suggest a charitable collection in your office/school/ university instead of Secret Santa.

Encourage anyone you know buying a kitten or puppy to get them from their local rescue center. Suggest they also consider volunteering for a few hours at the rescue center too to give a little back.

Most importantly, remember that goodwill is not just for Christmas. As we duck and dive through our daily lives, we should all do our utmost to Go Forth and Be Kind. I mean, just imagine if the world were powered by kindness… to paraphrase Sam Cooke, what a wonderful world that would be!

A big thank you to our interviewees for sharing their thoughts.

Thank you!

Thanks again, everyone! And thank YOU too for reading. We wish you all a very Merry Christmas!